I’ve Cooked For People I Should Have Poisoned Shirt
I’ve Cooked For People I Should Have Poisoned Shir
I’ve Cooked For People I Should Have Poisoned Shir
I’ve Cooked For People I Should Have Poisoned Shir
I’ve Cooked For People I Should Have Poisoned Shir
I’ve Cooked For People I Should Have Poisoned Shirt
I’ve Cooked For People I Should Have Poisoned Shir
I’ve Cooked For People I Should Have Poisoned Shir
I’ve Cooked For People I Should Have Poisoned Shir
I’ve Cooked For People I Should Have Poisoned Shir

I’ve Cooked For People I Should Have Poisoned Shirt

$19.95

Men
Size Guide

Size Chart

Unisex Tee
SIZE WIDTH LENGTH
S 18 in 28 in
M 20 in 29 in
L 22 in 30 in
XL 24 in 31 in
2XL 26 in 32 in
3XL 28 in 33 in
4XL 30 in 34 in
5XL 32 in 35 in

SC-Unisex-T-Shirt

  • 5.3-ounce, 100% cotton (99/1 cotton/poly (Ash) & 90/10 cotton/poly (Sport Grey)
  • Heavyweight classic unisex tee
  • Taped neck and shoulders; Tearaway label
  • Decoration type: Digital Print
SIZE WIDTH LENGTH
S 46 cm 71 cm
M 51 cm 74 cm
L 56 cm 76 cm
XL 61 cm 79 cm
2XL 66 cm 81 cm
3XL 71 cm 84 cm
4XL 76 cm 86 cm
5XL 81 cm 89 cm
SC-Unisex-T-Shirt
  • 5.3-ounce, 100% cotton (99/1 cotton/poly (Ash) & 90/10 cotton/poly (Sport Grey)
  • Heavyweight classic unisex tee
  • Taped neck and shoulders; Tearaway label
  • Decoration type: Digital Print
Ladies Tee
SIZE WIDTH LENGTH
S 17.25 in 25.5 in
M 19.25 in 26 in
L 21.25 in 27 in
XL 23.25 in 28 in
2XL 25.25 in 28.5 in
3XL 27.25 in 29 in
SC-Ladies-T-Shirt
 
  • 100% preshrunk cotton; Ash Grey 99% cotton, 1% polyester
  • Feminine 1/2 inch rib mid scoop neck; sideseamed with slightly tapered Missy fit
  • Double-needle stitching throughout; seamless rib at neck
  • Decoration Type: Digital Print
SIZE WIDTH LENGTH
S 43.8 cm 64.8 cm
M 48.9 cm 66 cm
L 54 cm 68.6 cm
XL 59 cm 71 cm
2XL 64 cm 71.8 cm
3XL 69.2 cm 73.7 cm
SC-Ladies-T-Shirt
  • 100% preshrunk cotton; Ash Grey 99% cotton, 1% polyester
  • Feminine 1/2 inch rib mid scoop neck; sideseamed with slightly tapered Missy fit
  • Double-needle stitching throughout; seamless rib at neck
  • Decoration Type: Digital Print
Unisex Crewneck Sweatshirt
SIZE WIDTH LENGTH
S 20 in 26 in
M 22 in 27 in
L 24 in 28 in
XL 26 in 29 in
2XL 28 in 30 in
3XL 30 in 31 in
4XL 32 in 32 in
5XL 34 in 33 in
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
SC-Sweatshirt
  • 8 oz; 55% cotton/45% polyester
  • Air jet yarn for a softer feel and no pilling
  • 1x1 athletic rib cuffs and waistband with spandex; Double-needle stitching
  • Care: Machine wash cold; Tumble dry low
  • Decoration type: Digital Print
SIZE WIDTH LENGTH
S 50.8 cm 66 cm
M 55.9 cm 74 cm
L 68.6 cm 71 cm
XL 66 cm 73.7 cm
2XL 71 cm 76 cm
3XL 76.2 cm 78.7 cm
4XL 81.3 cm 81.3 cm
5XL 86.4 cm 83.8 cm
SC-Sweatshirt
  • 8 oz; 55% cotton/45% polyester
  • Air jet yarn for a softer feel and no pilling
  • 1x1 athletic rib cuffs and waistband with spandex; Double-needle stitching
  • Care: Machine wash cold; Tumble dry low
  • Decoration type: Digital Print
Unisex Hoodie
SIZE WIDTH LENGTH
S 20 in 26 in
M 22 in 27 in
L 24 in 28 in
XL 26 in 29 in
2XL 28 in 30 in
3XL 29 in 32 in
4XL 32 in 33 in
5XL 34 in 34 in
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
SC-Hoodie
  • 5.3-ounce, 100% cotton (99/1 cotton/poly (Ash) & 90/10 cotton/poly (Sport Grey)
  • Heavyweight classic unisex tee
  • Taped neck and shoulders; Tearaway label
  • Decoration type: Digital Print
SIZE WIDTH LENGTH
S 50.8 cm 66 cm
M 55.9 cm 74 cm
L 68.6 cm 71 cm
XL 66 cm 73.7 cm
2XL 71 cm 76 cm
3XL 73.7 cm 81.3 cm
4XL 81.3 cm 83.8 cm
5XL 86.4 cm 86.4 cm
SC-Hoodie
  • 5.3-ounce, 100% cotton (99/1 cotton/poly (Ash) & 90/10 cotton/poly (Sport Grey)
  • Heavyweight classic unisex tee
  • Taped neck and shoulders; Tearaway label
  • Decoration type: Digital Print
Unisex Long Sleeve
SIZE WIDTH LENGTH
S 18 in 28 in
M 20 in 29 in
L 22 in 30 in
XL 24 in 31 in
2XL 26 in 32 in
3XL 28 in 33 in
4XL 30 in 34 in
5XL 32 in 35 in
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
SC-Long-Sleeve-T-Shirt
  • 5.3-ounce, 100% cotton (99/1 cotton/poly (Ash) & 90/10 cotton/poly (Sport Grey)
  • Heavyweight classic unisex tee
  • Taped neck and shoulders; Tearaway label
  • Decoration type: Digital Print
SIZE WIDTH LENGTH
S 46 cm 71 cm
M 51 cm 74 cm
L 56 cm 76 cm
XL 61 cm 79 cm
2XL 66 cm 81 cm
3XL 71 cm 84 cm
4XL 76 cm 86 cm
5XL 81 cm 89 cm
SC-Long-Sleeve-T-Shirt
  • 5.3-ounce, 100% cotton (99/1 cotton/poly (Ash) & 90/10 cotton/poly (Sport Grey)
  • Heavyweight classic unisex tee
  • Taped neck and shoulders; Tearaway label
  • Decoration type: Digital Print
Youth Tee
SIZE WIDTH LENGTH
YXS 16 in 20.5 in
YS 17 in 22 in
YM 18 in 23.5 in
YL 19 in 25 in
YXL 20 in 26.5 in
     
     
     
     
     
     
SC-Youth-T-Shirt
  • 5.3-ounce, 100% cotton (99/1 cotton/poly (Ash) & 90/10 cotton/poly (Sport Grey)
  • Heavyweight classic unisex tee
  • Taped neck and shoulders; Tearaway label
  • Decoration type: Digital Print
SIZE WIDTH LENGTH
YXS 40.6 cm 52 cm
YS 43.2 cm 55.9 cm
YM 45.7 cm 59.7 cm
YL 48.6 cm 63.5 cm
YXL 50.8 cm 67.3 cm
SC-Youth-T-Shirt
  • 5.3-ounce, 100% cotton (99/1 cotton/poly (Ash) & 90/10 cotton/poly (Sport Grey)
  • Heavyweight classic unisex tee
  • Taped neck and shoulders; Tearaway label
  • Decoration type: Digital Print
Men Tank Top
SIZE WIDTH LENGTH
XS 16 in 27 in
S 18 in 28 in
M 20 in 29 in
L 22 in 30 in
XL 24 in 31 in
2XL 26 in 32 in
3XL 28 in 33 in
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
SC-Men-Tank-Top
  • 5.3-ounce, 100% cotton (99/1 cotton/poly (Ash) & 90/10 cotton/poly (Sport Grey)
  • Heavyweight classic unisex tee
  • Taped neck and shoulders; Tearaway label
  • Decoration type: Digital Print
SIZE WIDTH LENGTH
XS 40.6 cm 68.6 cm
S 45.7 cm 71 cm
M 50.8 cm 73.6 cm
L 55.9 cm 76.2 cm
XL 61 cm 78.7 cm
2XL 71 cm 83.8 cm
3XL 81.3 cm 81.3 cm
SC-Men-Tank-Top
  • 5.3-ounce, 100% cotton (99/1 cotton/poly (Ash) & 90/10 cotton/poly (Sport Grey)
  • Heavyweight classic unisex tee
  • Taped neck and shoulders; Tearaway label
  • Decoration type: Digital Print
Women Tank Top
SIZE WIDTH LENGTH
XS 14 in 27 in
S 15 in 27.5 in
M 16 in 28 in
L 17 in 28.5 in
XL 18 in 29 in
2XL 19 in 29.5 in
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
SC-Racerback-Tank-Top
  • 4 oz, 60% combed ring-spun cotton/40% polyester jersey
  • 30 singles
  • Fabric laundered for reduced shrinkage; Runs small, we suggest ordering up
  • Decoration type: Digital Print
SIZE WIDTH LENGTH
XS 35.6 cm 68.6 cm
S 38 cm 69.8 cm
M 40.6 cm 71.1 cm
L 43.2 cm 72.4 cm
XL 45.7 cm 73.7 cm
2XL 48.3 cm 74.9 cm
SC-Racerback-Tank-Top
  • 4 oz, 60% combed ring-spun cotton/40% polyester jersey
  • 30 singles
  • Fabric laundered for reduced shrinkage; Runs small, we suggest ordering up
  • Decoration type: Digital Print
Youth Pullover Hoodie
SIZE WIDTH LENGTH
YS 14 in 17 in
YM 16 in 19.5 in
YL 18.75 in 23 in
YXL 20.5 in 24.5 in
     
     
     
     
     
SC-Youth-Hoodie
  • 7.75-ounce, 50% cotton, 50% polyester
  • No drawcord on kids' hoodies
  • We suggest ordering one or two sizes up for a fuller fit; Please refer to size chart for actual garment measurements
  • Decoration type: Digital Print
SIZE WIDTH LENGTH
YS 35.5 cm 43.2 cm
YM 40.6 cm 49.5 cm
YL 47.6 cm 58.4 cm
YXL 52.1 cm 62.2 cm
SC-Youth-Hoodie
  • 7.75-ounce, 50% cotton, 50% polyester
  • No drawcord on kids' hoodies
  • We suggest ordering one or two sizes up for a fuller fit; Please refer to size chart for actual garment measurements
  • Decoration type: Digital Print
  • Total: $0.00
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Because Humor Is the Best Revenge: The I’ve Cooked For People I Should Have Poisoned Shirt – Make Dark Thoughts Look Damn Good. Some people bake cookies to relieve stress. Others daydream about serving up vengeance with a garnish. If you fall into the latter category, we’ve got the perfect garment for you. The I’ve Cooked For People I Should Have Poisoned Shirt is the crown jewel of sarcastic apparel for anyone who’s ever practiced the fine art of smiling through the simmer.

I’ve Cooked For People I Should Have Poisoned Shirt – A Must-Have for Home Cooks and Sarcastic Souls

Let’s call it what it is: this shirt is dark, bold, and just a little bit unhinged—in the best way possible. It tells your dinner guests, your coworkers, and your in-laws everything they need to know without a single passive-aggressive comment. You’ve put in the emotional labor, you’ve withheld the rage, and now you get to wear your victory.

I’ve Cooked For People I Should Have Poisoned Shirt
I’ve Cooked For People I Should Have Poisoned Shirt

Gift this I’ve Cooked For People I Should Have Poisoned Shirt to your kitchen-confessional bestie, your culinary-genius mom, or your burnt-out roommate who survives potluck dinners on sheer willpower. Or wear it yourself the next time someone critiques your food, asks for ketchup on their steak, or invites themselves over for dinner without lifting a finger.

So go ahead—embrace your inner villain-turned-hero. Let the I’ve Cooked For People I Should Have Poisoned Shirt do the talking while you keep smiling and stirring. Because sometimes, the most powerful flex is what you didn’t do.

I’ve Cooked For People I Should Have Poisoned Shirt Details:

  • Unisex T-Shirt: 5.3-ounce, 100% cotton; 99/1 cotton/poly (Ash); 90/10 cotton/poly (Sport Grey); 50/50 cotton/poly (Dark Heather).
  • Ladies T-Shirt: 5.3oz, 100% preshrunk cotton; 99/1 cotton/poly (Ash); 90/10 cotton/poly (Sport Grey); 50/50 cotton/poly (Dark Heather).
  • Ladies Ideal Racerback Tank: 4 oz, 60% combed ring-spun cotton/40% polyester jersey; Fitted Style; We suggest sizing up.
  • Men Tank Top: 5.3 oz., 100% USA cotton; Made with sustainably & fairly grown USA cotton;
  • Pullover Hoodie: 8 oz, 50/50 cotton/poly (Fabric composition may vary by color); Two-ply hood with grommets, dyed-to-match drawcord & low-pill fleece;
  • Crewneck Pullover Sweatshirt: 8 oz, 50/50 cotton/poly; Air jet yarn for a softer feel and no pilling.
  • Long Sleeve Ultra Cotton T-Shirt: 5.3 oz., 100% USA cotton; 99/1 cotton/poly (Ash); 90/10 cotton/poly (Sport Grey); Seamless rib at neck; Taped shoulder-to-shoulder, Ribbed cuffs.
  • Brand: Allbluetees